Battle Hymns of a Hot Mess Mom

One day at a time…

Morphine

After and exhausting morning getting the picc line inserted – I wasn’t admitted to the hospital until 8:45pm. Then they told me unfortunately chemotherapy would be tomorrow morning not today. So I came here to sleep? Really? Nurse R said, I may just want to count my blessings because night chemo will be incredibly uncomfortable. But will this additional missed day be detrimental to me? Gotta ask Dr P. So tired. Can’t even think now.

New Friend

This is my new friend, the one that will keep me hydrated and pump the chemo in me. He’s the one that will keep level when transfusions are needed. Meet, Dave. Unlike his distant cousin Kevin, Dave is thicc and a little brighter in the screen. Though Monica is wayyy the f*ck louder. She is clearly going through menopause as the fan turns on to cool her down every 15-20 minutes. It’s obnoxious.

Monica

The morphine went in and felt like a soft pillow. I feel not much. This and fentanyl are both delightful meds. 5am blood draw and meds. Off to bed.

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About Me

Hello, my name is Nina. I am a mother, wife, daughter and friend. I am lover of country music, & 80’s love ballad. I love me some karaoke! I identify as hot mess mom. I get it wrong, all the time. On the rare occasions I get it right? Even I’m shocked.

I am a working professional in the field of Compliance. I am mother two, daughter to immigrant parents, wife to a “redneck” – and proud of it, sister-in-law to the two most incredible human beings I have ever met and a niece that is just so cool but doesn’t know it.

I work too hard and play too little. I’ve always focus on the wrong thing and never quite sure if I’m ever enough. I grew up on the East Coast and was a latchkey kid in the 80’s and 90’s – I dodged the sketchy people on the walk home and tried not to end up on a milk carton.

I went to a very privileged Boarding School on the East Coast and college after that. (So yeah that’s exactly why this journal will be riddled with grammatical and spelling errors. On the days I feel good, I’ll type it out. On the days I don’t feel good it’ll be voice to text. I can not be held liable for the things Siri puts in as my “voice”. ) Graduated on a Friday and started Fleet Bank on a Saturday. I hustled my way through the midnight shift at DHL and hustled and hustled and hustled. I knew nothing except the hustle. (As I said, I’m a hot mess mom).

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