Battle Hymns of a Hot Mess Mom

One day at a time…


Exhaustion

I didn’t end going to bed until 6:30am and slept until 7:45am when L came into the room to ask about his retainer. I feel like a complete zombie, unsure of what is what is what, who is where or even where I am. One medicine makes me high like I’m on meth or crack, one makes me literally sh*t myself every 2 hours, one suppresses my appetite. All of them counteract my sleeping pills, which of course stress me out because a I’m up all night like a complete psycho when I should be fast asleep.

I created a large Walmart order at 4:30am because there is nothing that I can cook to help J out. I laid on the couch like a roasted potato and couldn’t move or eat. I just laid there until 1:30pm; my whole body was just uncomfortable. The Home Health Nurse drew blood then the Physical Therapist…for a negative energy day I had a lot going on.

I managed to make meatloaf, corn casserole and green beans tonight – but not enough energy to sit at the table to eat. I remained on the couch and at my one spoonful of each. After about an hour I mustered the energy to load the dishwasher and pack up the leftovers. I crawled into the shower and just sat on my shower chair zoned out. My brain still doesn’t work.

Today was just a brain fog day. My brain just couldn’t work today. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.



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About Me

Hello, my name is Nina. I am a mother, wife, daughter and friend. I am lover of country music, & 80’s love ballad. I love me some karaoke! I identify as hot mess mom. I get it wrong, all the time. On the rare occasions I get it right? Even I’m shocked.

I am a working professional in the field of Compliance. I am mother two, daughter to immigrant parents, wife to a “redneck” – and proud of it, sister-in-law to the two most incredible human beings I have ever met and a niece that is just so cool but doesn’t know it.

I work too hard and play too little. I’ve always focus on the wrong thing and never quite sure if I’m ever enough. I grew up on the East Coast and was a latchkey kid in the 80’s and 90’s – I dodged the sketchy people on the walk home and tried not to end up on a milk carton.

I went to a very privileged Boarding School on the East Coast and college after that. (So yeah that’s exactly why this journal will be riddled with grammatical and spelling errors. On the days I feel good, I’ll type it out. On the days I don’t feel good it’ll be voice to text. I can not be held liable for the things Siri puts in as my “voice”. ) Graduated on a Friday and started Fleet Bank on a Saturday. I hustled my way through the midnight shift at DHL and hustled and hustled and hustled. I knew nothing except the hustle. (As I said, I’m a hot mess mom).

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