Battle Hymns of a Hot Mess Mom

Tomorrow 6am is the first milestone biopsy. My FIL was supposed to take me, but then suddenly today I started to get anxious. I feel good in my heart, but my mind is delicate…sometimes it can go into places that it has no business going. I made it up the stairs on my own today, I even washed a pot…but I didn’t walk around the house like I should have. I did move around in the kitchen – more than the days before but not enough I think for today. This is the last week I’ll have FIL home with me, then next week… I’ll need to start doing things more on my own. If I want food, I need to go downstairs and make it. I will need to make an effort to take more independent care of myself. Kids will have to walk to school until I’m strong enough to drive.

I may be able to drive the short short distance but would need to be confident before I get behind the wheel with my children. Especially as the weather turns rainy, I’ll want to be able to drive them to school. But one day at a time, I’ll need to just take things one day at a time.

My mind isn’t focused tonight, lots of mixed thoughts running in my head to get focused on unpacking. I know tomorrow is going to be an early day with J and I needing to leave around 4:30am to get to COH. We want to be the first one to check in, but it will be an extremely long day tomorrow. I am hoping that I have the strength and the energy since I still need to get labs, dressing change, pick up meds as well as see Dr. P. Maybe that will reward me with a day off on Friday since Mix will be flying in and I will want to see the kids play their soccer game as well. It’ll be nice to be able to rest for most of the day and charge up the battery so that I can use my heated blanket for the 7:00pm game. L offered to take both kids to the game on Friday. Maybe we can bring some pizza to them on the field since I don’t think Mix will be interested in seeing my kids play soccer.

Time to mindlessly scroll through IG and look at puppy videos.