Battle Hymns of a Hot Mess Mom

What a drive! We arrived around 4pm which fave just enough time to unload before J, B and kiddos headed off to the Bananas games. Apparently it’s a trick performing baseball team. I don’t really quite understand real baseball so I don’t have much in me to understand any other baseball. A and I stayed home because K had dental surgery. She was rough! She got super sick on the pain med and was vomiting every 10 minutes or so. I feel your pain. But at the same time I felt more pain – watching her throw up, shake and cry was different than actually being the one going through it. Your heart hurts for them, physically your heart hurts for them. You can’t take anything away and you can’t stop it. You can rub their back and remind them to take deep breaths. But let’s face it, in your mind you’re just thinking f*ckkkk this sucks. At least that’s where I go.

We ordered Chinese food and stayed in. K fell asleep finally around 8:00pm in what looked like quite an uncomfortable position but she was exhausted. Barfing takes effort. Everyone returned home close to 10:00pm and it sounded like so much happiness in their voices. After the children showered and headed off to bed the adult downloaded on the evenings events and started making “Thank You” bags for the fundraiser the next day. I started pretty successful on cutting the ribbon but found myself quickly fading so J took over with the snipping. We created 105 bags for the next nights festivities. We initially didn’t think driving for the fundraiser then starting chemo two days afterwards was a smart idea. It’s a long drive there and back – and being in the car for that long doesn’t sit in my odds of having a good day. But with chemo being pushed out another week, I get a few more good days and I get to support this cause and help out some. A was a full on high speed train.

We finished the bags around 1:00am and A had to get up for work at 6:00am as she’d be home early to go to the event center to start setting up. I enjoyed my own stint in barfing. Always a delight. Then laid down the rest of the morning until A got home. I showered for the first time since the biopsy (I thankfully wasn’t too sweaty but I felt gross) and got dressed to head to the event center. I didn’t bring the wig with me. While my hair looks like Fraggle Rock – I went without.

It’s hard not to feel self conscious when everyone is dressed up beautifully. The theme was Casino Night so there was some James Bond feel to it all. It was an adults only evening which added to the extra of it all. I feel more like Shrek than a Bond girl…not even in the same planet as a Bond girl. A had a fire outfit on and we headed back out to do last minute setting up while the guys got ready and the Uber picked them up.

When we left the room was just coming along the casino tables were set up but the balloons were still being blown up and the DJ equipment was just being brought in. But when we arrived at 5:00pm the event hall had transformed and we could see A’s design and vision for the evening come to life. It was very impressive. I tried to help where I could and mostly just trailed behind A and offered help where I could. Bond night was beginning. We took goofy photos at the Photo Booth – J and I did out photo session early on to beat the crowds. He ended up with Shrek in one of the photos. I followed up with Shrek in the evening photos haha. We ate, drank…I caught A getting down to Usher and we gambled our funny money for charity. K and I learned Roulette and learned we were not good at Roulette. I put the chips on the kiddos birthday, J’s, third row, black, odd…I was all over the place hahaha. I’d be down to two chips and back alive. Then down to two chips again and back alive. Id follow some guy betting on 0 and 00 then come up with a W. K and I dumpster fired through it all.

The last time I did a casino night was back early 2000’s at a conference. My beloved friend A and I have been meeting up in DC yearly for a professional conference for over 10 years. I was invited to a sponsored Booze Cruise and she was my plus one. We both had no idea how the tables worked and figured we would try our luck at Craps! What a night that was for us. We also fumbled our way through the game and surprisingly we did pretty well. We laughed, drank and gambled the night away while the boat swayed us up and down the Potomac River. I clearly have good fun at Casino nights but not at the real Casinos. Funny money – let it ride…I’m a gangster! Real money – I’m at the penny slots with a $0.05 max bet. I just can’t when it’s real money. Truth be told I have never been good at gambling- I’ve always been someone else’s lucky charm but never my own when it came to gambling.

7/29 We all have been going to bed closer to midnight – 1:00am then regular bedtime. While I used to be a huge night owl – I find myself dragging each day I don’t sleep well enough. I’m definitely not feeling well today. Words are harder today. Focus is harder as well. I think and have to rethink again and again I feel. Everyone is playing cribbage but I can’t focus or mentally follow along so I have retreated to lay down and mentally decompress. We leave for home tomorrow along with our $1.66 a pack chicken – we bought close to 60 pounds of chicken to bring home – there was a killer sale and we took advantage. All together we purchase around 120 pounds of chicken for $40. I’m letting myself drift a little – not wearing ear plugs but letting myself nap if I need. B made Pozole and A mares Sopes – if there was ever a perfect dinner it would be this. With full bellies – I’m off to nap.