Battle Hymns of a Hot Mess Mom

Yesterday didn’t go exactly as I planned. We got up early for the swim meet and setup for the day with our chairs. Within a few hours the “palace” was roasting, It was hot as sin with no air movement and humid thickness that just made every shift feel gross. I had both of my mini fans on me but no relief. By 10:30am I was struggling to hold on. Conversations within the “palace” made it tolerable but I was having a hard time. M wasn’t feeling it either, so our two miserable selves held on event after event. I don’t walk up to the pool to watch the kids swim, it’s too hot and there are too many people, so he video tapes each event for me. S won all 3 of her events and brought back a laminated “HEAT WINNER” card each time with a huge smile on her face which was a far cry from last weeks’ “I don’t want to try” situation.

The event cards last week were screwed up and children had event #s written on their arm that didn’t match the card they were issued, or had another child swim in their event and even lane. As a result S was given a new card with a manual adjustment but would have her swim against the boys. She was so upset that she quit the event. This behavior isn’t supported in our household while I freely admit I am a hotness of a mother, my baseline for the children is “give your best effort”. I’m no Tiger Mom yet also not the antithesis of one – I take what I found useful in my childhood and apply it to my parental catalog. I fully acknowledge that it may be the wrong catalog, but that will be for my children to navigate.

I don’t request that my children are straight A students, but you need to give me your best effort. If that means you are a full C student, then I am incredibly proud of you. My children do not call elders by their first name, Miss / Mr are attached (Mr. Patrick, Miss Tina) and if they are close we go to Auntie / Uncle. I cringed when teens or younger call me by my first name – and will correct the younger ones with a quick “Miss Nina” while the teenagers…I just stay quiet and remind myself…everyone’s catalog is different.

Best effort looks different for everyone, at swim meets…I just want them to try their best and sometimes that just basic. Do you have your swim cap on? Do you know where your goggles are? Truly the most basic of expectations and if heading to the ready bench with your sh*t together is your best effort, then let’s celebrate!

Everyone swam and gave their best effort yesterday, but when we got home I had enough to shower and that was the end of my day. I slept on and off from 1:30pm until 7:30am this morning. While I feel guilty that I slept so long, I clearly didn’t have enough in me yesterday for a 7 hour swim meet. I think next week, depending on the heat I may just sit it out.

S and J are going to the farmers’ market, this has always been my activity with S…and while I know I can’t ride the bike with her there right now…I was butthurt and slightly jealous. Riding to the farmer’s market on the weekend has all been our thing, so the fact that J took her today made me sad. I know that she shouldn’t miss out because I am sick. L and I decided to go out for Dim Sum

It’s not the most authentic but it is decent and fair priced, we just can’t pig out cause it’s just the two of us though we ordered all the right yummies that hit the spot. L and I spent some time catching Pokémon’s and then getting gas at Costco. We watched in half amusement and annoyance of a woman parked half in the gas lane and half in the through drive lane. She proceeded to exit her car and pump gas until the attendant told her to get back in the car and adjust her vehicle to allow car to pass through. L2 Drive.

J and I are watching Lost Girls – since the LI killer has been in the news. Massapequa, NY home of the All American Burger – I still swoon for that burger. But apparently that’s where the killer lives. I haven’t followed it closely enough. Just that it’s the LI killer. The movie has been a bit slow so far. The movie wasn’t great, the ending updates were sad though. The mom died from a fatal injury from her youngest daughter after a schizophrenic episode. Maybe there will make a documentary after the killer is indicted. My feral children are back from their respective adventures out of the house. It gave me time to get the dishes and laundry done at least.