It feels like a rollercoaster of fear, sadness, and uncertainty has taken over my life once again. Despite hoping and praying for the best, the reality has hit me hard. My sense of security has been shattered, and I find myself grappling with a mix bag of thoughts. How do I face this head-on? I Continue reading

Bone marrow aspirate: A small abnormal myeloblast population is identified I’m trying to sit with this. I’ve got nothing. Continue reading

After a short trip to escape from it all – it’s time to go homeward. It’s always a great time and always sad to leave. I learned my lesson coming up that I didn’t want to take medicine before the car ride but also learned that taking it too late made me sick as hell. Continue reading

What a drive! We arrived around 4pm which fave just enough time to unload before J, B and kiddos headed off to the Bananas games. Apparently it’s a trick performing baseball team. I don’t really quite understand real baseball so I don’t have much in me to understand any other baseball. A and I stayed Continue reading

I underwent my second bone marrow biopsy yesterday and while it was less painful than the first outpatient one, it was still incredibly painful. The procedure involved drilling into my hip to extract a sample of bone marrow. As the medical team prepared me for the biopsy, I could feel my anxiety rising, knowing what Continue reading

Here I am, staring at the ceiling, contemplating the wonders of the universe, like why do they call it “sleep like a baby” when babies are basically tiny insomniacs? Oh, the irony! But let’s not digress; we’ve got bigger fish to fry – like my transplant donor testing taking an extended vacation, leaving me hanging. Continue reading

Today, I find myself reflecting on the topic of regrets. Regrets are the shadows of past choices, haunting the pockets of my mind where Baba Yaga thrives. They serve as reminders of opportunities missed, words left unsaid, and actions that could have been different. While it’s natural to experience regrets in life, for we are Continue reading

The last two nights I have woken up to panic attacks. I’ve always had them but haven’t since I was diagnosed with cancer and for some reason the last two nights I have woken up afraid. I can usually coax myself out of it in a few minutes and shake it off but the feeling Continue reading

Adele sings: Nothing compares, no worries or caresRegrets and mistakes, they’re memories madeWho would have known how bittersweet this would taste?Never mind, I’ll find someone like youI wish nothing but the best for you“Don’t forget me, ” I begI remember you said“Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead”I may be feeling melancholy Continue reading

In today’s fast-paced world, where our lives are often filled with endless distractions and hectic schedules, it’s essential to find solace in simplicity. Sometimes, the most mundane of days can hold a charm of their own. The beauty of a seemingly uneventful day spent watching television and engaging in delightful conversations with the furry doggo. Continue reading