Battle Hymns of a Hot Mess Mom

One day at a time…

Fetal Position

The last few days have just been a switch of fetal positions and stomachache pain. CT Results: Colitis. An inflammatory reaction in the colon, often autoimmune or infectious. Not my best me.

6:00am

The last two days the fog has been pretty thick. At one point it looked like we were in a cloud. Very representative of my mood…cloudy. While J hasn’t left my side except to go home and shower – we haven’t had much conversation. I just “uh huh” in the fetal position while he tells me something. I haven’t been good company. Really hoping the antibiotics will help the inflammation in my intestines – this pain is for the BIRDS.

This is the mental tough part, right? This is where you gotta eat even if it hurts. You got rest, despite pain? I’m such a coward when it comes to pain. I used to joke with J that I wanted to join the CIA and he would laugh and say “all they would have to do is put a needle in front of you….it’d be over.” Valid point! Like that Saw movie when the girl was swimming in a tub of needles for something? Yea no….I’ll help the killer! What do you need? I got you! I spiked another fever last night, and while Nurse Z said she would give me 10:00pm – 5:00am to sleep – she snuck in and checked my vitals at 3:00am. I appreciate her! Fever was gone and she left me to sleep until 5:10am.

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About Me

Hello, my name is Nina. I am a mother, wife, daughter and friend. I am lover of country music, & 80’s love ballad. I love me some karaoke! I identify as hot mess mom. I get it wrong, all the time. On the rare occasions I get it right? Even I’m shocked.

I am a working professional in the field of Compliance. I am mother two, daughter to immigrant parents, wife to a “redneck” – and proud of it, sister-in-law to the two most incredible human beings I have ever met and a niece that is just so cool but doesn’t know it.

I work too hard and play too little. I’ve always focus on the wrong thing and never quite sure if I’m ever enough. I grew up on the East Coast and was a latchkey kid in the 80’s and 90’s – I dodged the sketchy people on the walk home and tried not to end up on a milk carton.

I went to a very privileged Boarding School on the East Coast and college after that. (So yeah that’s exactly why this journal will be riddled with grammatical and spelling errors. On the days I feel good, I’ll type it out. On the days I don’t feel good it’ll be voice to text. I can not be held liable for the things Siri puts in as my “voice”. ) Graduated on a Friday and started Fleet Bank on a Saturday. I hustled my way through the midnight shift at DHL and hustled and hustled and hustled. I knew nothing except the hustle. (As I said, I’m a hot mess mom).

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